I Thought Today Was Black Friday

13.8.09

So yesterday I did that presentation for Global Culture and Society,

(My International and Global Studies core subject which is derived from the Anthropology and Sociology faculties),

The one for which my partner pulled out due to swine flu.

It actually went surprisingly well,

Considering I didn't practise it at all.

Well... a few people thanked me/congratulated me afterwards, anyway.

That included my tutor, though, and that's always a good sign

And also this cute girl who I'd never met before.

It definitely helped that no one had done the readings

And I could eat up a lot of time explaining what they were about.

Not that I'm going to let that detract from my resulting good mood.

If there's anything that's taken me more than a decade to get alright at,

It's public speaking.

If you've heard Rory spouting stories about a fabled morning in Year 9 English

When I stumbled my way through a speech about the Da Vinci Code

Not without obscenities

And thought he was spreading lies

Then you'd be wrong

Because that definitely did happen.

I will never forget.

Not least because I'm reminded of it every now and then.

I vividly remembering not wanting to do my speech in Year 2.

I might've acted sick

Or I might just have never volunteered to go next

Because I did it on a day when nobody else did theirs

And everyone I think was doing something else and barely listening to me

Read from my A4 sheet of paper.

I even remember that the writing on that sheet of paper was all red and orange

Because our printer had run out of black ink

And I'm pretty sure the font I used was Comic Sans.

I was actually selected as a reserve for the next level of public speaking in year 4

And I was asked to go in year 6

But I didn't go.

In year 12, my palm cards were still a little damp from my heart beating a million times a minute.

I think that it wasn't until this year that I've become actually comfortable

With standing up and speaking in front of poeple.

That's kindof sad, isn't it?

Okay, so I don't know where I'm going with this anymore.

Have you ever heard of Niall Ferguson?

Since having to study this video of him last semester

And imitating him

I can no longer speak normally.

That stupidly smug faux-stutter,

Pretending to think of what I'm going to say next when I already decided before I opened my mouth.

I'm wondering how much I did that yesterday ha ha.

And also how annoying it must be when I do do it,

Or perhaps I've actually mastered his charm and that's why people thought I knew what I was talking about?